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Andrew Christie

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goat

Faheem Fast Food – Not entirely a flubboodha-free zone

March 27, 2016 by Andrew Christie 2 Comments

faheem1Everybody was all like “Ooh, ooh, I want to come to Faheem’s,” which suited us because more people means more dishes to try. But then of course it was all, “I can’t do Friday…” and “… they’ve changed the roster…” and “…they changed it back again…” then there was, “…this bug is going around the school…” and of course “…jetlagged.” So it was a bit of an easter miracle that four of us were able to synchronise our schedules and home in on Enmore Road on Saturday night.

The final make up of the party was Strop and me, with the Stropolina and her new beau, the Lifesaver, so at least there were enough of us to seriously over order without looking too greedy.

Faheem Fast Food is a bit of an urban legend around our area. Its fluoro lighting, tiled walls, and no-nonsense tables have been greeting taxi drivers, families and hipsters since… well, for a very long time. They serve up splendid Pakistani and Indian dishes in a very timely manner, so much so that it has restored my faith in nominative determinism.

Our first stop though, was a little bar called Midnight Special, because Faheem might be fast but he is not licensed. Strop and I stopped here last Tuesday before going on to see the wonderful Tedeschi Trucks Band at the Enmore Theatre. As well as good beers and an excellent blues soundtrack, they were offering bao buns with a variety of protein based fillings. I thought that the pulled pork with lots of Asian flavours was particularly yummy, but Strop compared the actual bao bun as being a bit like a thong. Which led to a brief moment of confusion until she clarified that she was referring to footwear. On Saturday night the place was a lot more crowded and the soundtrack a lot less interesting (70s/80s hits and misses — all filler, no thriller). We had our one drink and toddled on up the road to Faheem’s with the soundtrack now changed to the Stropolina going “I want to go to that one… and that one too, ooh look at that, it too.” Good that she is so loyal to the family enterprise. I’m not sure what the Lifesaver made of it all, especially when we tried to explain to him the concept of rating accessibility according to the Susan Scale. He was able to point out the best late night kebab spots on Enmore Road though, so he is already proving his worth.

We were seated at the back of Faheem’s, just outside the kitchen, and conveniently close to the help-yourself-to-drinks fridge. My only stipulation on the ordering front was that we had to have something from the tandoor. Strop and the Stropolina handled the rest of it.

In no time at all a splendid spread was laid out in front of us. A whole bright-orange-with-black-charcoaly-bits tandoori chicken, was quickly followed by, dahl, chick peas, a goat korma masala, aloo gosht, and of course, garlic naan.

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It. Was. All. Excellent – although the Stropolina did think that there was too much “flubboodha” in the goat. This is her term for any animal-based food that is not meat. She has a very low tolerance for discrete bits of fat, gristle or any kind of connective tissue. We have learned to make allowances as she has so many other redeeming features.

Faheem provides a no-frills service. Help yourself to soft drinks, lassi, or chilled water from the fridge. The glasses are just as likely to be hot, coming straight from the dishwasher, but at least the water is cold. It is relaxed, cheerful, and extremely tasty. You need to go. Now.

In terms of ratings:

Accessibility: 5/5 Susans – and there is a carpark out the back.

Value? Up there I’d say, 4/5 Wendys.

Salt? Didn’t notice, so I guess that is 5/5 Debs.

Midnight Special though, deserves a special accessibility mention. The toilets are up three stairs, which means 0/5 Susans for them.

Next up might be a Portuguese Chicken joint, I’ll have to check and get back to you.

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Filed Under: Encore, Quest Tagged With: Blues, goat, naan, tandoori, tedeschi trucks band

Shaahi Tandoori – Doesn’t always come with a floorshow

March 12, 2016 by Andrew Christie 1 Comment

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I blame Strop. I blame her for my complete lack of professionalism in regard to this blogging business. I should have a schedule, and I would have, if only Strop would stop having birthdays. And if she hadn’t married me, we wouldn’t have had to go to Hobart to celebrate however many years it’s been now. And if I hadn’t been cooped up in a big, aerialised, aluminium tube with a bunch of sick people I wouldn’t have caught man flu…

Actually I blame David Walsh for creating MONA. If he hadn’t done that, then we wouldn’t have felt like the only people left in Sydney who hadn’t been to see the wall of vaginas and none of this would have happened.

So on behalf of David Walsh and Strop, I apologise for the yawning chasm that is the last month on this blog. It won’t happen again. Ever. I promise. Cross my heart, all of that. Never, ever. Ever.

Before we were so rudely interrupted, I seem to remember a trip to a surprisingly enjoyable Indian restaurant. In terms of sub-continental cuisine on Enmore Road, Faheem’s Fast Food casts a very long shadow that hides all other curry joints. I had never noticed Shaahi Tandoori before this visit, but I’m pretty sure we’ll go back. Particularly for the Goat Curry and the Salted Lassi. Yummo.

We sat at the front table with an excellent view of the buses roaring past, and the passing parade of pedestrian punters on their way to the Enmore Theatre. Tonight the crowd appeared to be predominantly of a certain age and greyness. Well, the men were, I suspect a bit of colouration was at work in many of the women’s hair. One of the entertaining things about a night out on Enmore Road is the changing nature of the street crowd depending on who is playing at the Enmore Theatre.

A very sweet and attentive young woman took our order which included Paneer, Chicken 65, Aloo Mattar and Garlic Nan, as well as the goat and the lassi. One of the problems we have found with dining on our own is that we want to try a lot more dishes than we can actually eat. We usually make a pretty good effort though, a clean plate is a good plate, but we pay for it on the walk home.

The Paneer was a bit heavy for my taste but the Chicken 65 was terrific. Basically fried chicken but with all the flavours. I’ll go back for that one too. The Goat Curry was dark, succulent and spicy. Lucky we had the Salted Lassi. I’ve never had it before and it was terrifically refreshing, as well as easing the effects of the chilli.

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While we were working our way through too much food, Strop caught a glimpse of a pair of nephews walking up the other side of the street. As she leapt to her feet and rushed out the door I took the opportunity to nab another piece of fried chicken. Strop waved and hallooed across the road, and Keir and Charlie waved back. I kept eating.

Five minutes later Keir and Charlie showed up at Shaahi Tandoori. Apparently their family were just down the road at Cow and The Moon having a refreshing gelato. Young Charlie’s tolerance for watching his aunt and uncle eat food that he wouldn’t touch with a light sabre, was understandably low, so they didn’t stay very long.

Strop and I were back to enjoying the food, trying to decide if we could discreetly undo our belts a couple of notches, when Keir returned. This time he and Charlie had Emma and Will in tow. While Em came and joined us at the table, Keir and Will, proceeded to put on a floorshow outside on the footpath. Enmore Road has everything you need for a night out. You can see part of the show here.

When Charlie couldn’t stand it anymore, Em took her tribe and headed for home, while Strop and I wandered back down Enmore Road.

At the Enmore Theatre the reason for the greying crowd became apparent. Icehouse were playing.

Faheem’s Fast Food is next up on Enmore Road, I’m looking forward to the comparison.

And now for the ratings: Accessibility – 5 Susans; Value – 4.5 Wendys.

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Filed Under: Encore, Uncategorized Tagged With: Curry, floor show, goat, Indian, lassi

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