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Andrew Christie

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Blues

Faheem Fast Food – Not entirely a flubboodha-free zone

March 27, 2016 by Andrew Christie 2 Comments

faheem1Everybody was all like “Ooh, ooh, I want to come to Faheem’s,” which suited us because more people means more dishes to try. But then of course it was all, “I can’t do Friday…” and “… they’ve changed the roster…” and “…they changed it back again…” then there was, “…this bug is going around the school…” and of course “…jetlagged.” So it was a bit of an easter miracle that four of us were able to synchronise our schedules and home in on Enmore Road on Saturday night.

The final make up of the party was Strop and me, with the Stropolina and her new beau, the Lifesaver, so at least there were enough of us to seriously over order without looking too greedy.

Faheem Fast Food is a bit of an urban legend around our area. Its fluoro lighting, tiled walls, and no-nonsense tables have been greeting taxi drivers, families and hipsters since… well, for a very long time. They serve up splendid Pakistani and Indian dishes in a very timely manner, so much so that it has restored my faith in nominative determinism.

Our first stop though, was a little bar called Midnight Special, because Faheem might be fast but he is not licensed. Strop and I stopped here last Tuesday before going on to see the wonderful Tedeschi Trucks Band at the Enmore Theatre. As well as good beers and an excellent blues soundtrack, they were offering bao buns with a variety of protein based fillings. I thought that the pulled pork with lots of Asian flavours was particularly yummy, but Strop compared the actual bao bun as being a bit like a thong. Which led to a brief moment of confusion until she clarified that she was referring to footwear. On Saturday night the place was a lot more crowded and the soundtrack a lot less interesting (70s/80s hits and misses — all filler, no thriller). We had our one drink and toddled on up the road to Faheem’s with the soundtrack now changed to the Stropolina going “I want to go to that one… and that one too, ooh look at that, it too.” Good that she is so loyal to the family enterprise. I’m not sure what the Lifesaver made of it all, especially when we tried to explain to him the concept of rating accessibility according to the Susan Scale. He was able to point out the best late night kebab spots on Enmore Road though, so he is already proving his worth.

We were seated at the back of Faheem’s, just outside the kitchen, and conveniently close to the help-yourself-to-drinks fridge. My only stipulation on the ordering front was that we had to have something from the tandoor. Strop and the Stropolina handled the rest of it.

In no time at all a splendid spread was laid out in front of us. A whole bright-orange-with-black-charcoaly-bits tandoori chicken, was quickly followed by, dahl, chick peas, a goat korma masala, aloo gosht, and of course, garlic naan.

faheem2

It. Was. All. Excellent – although the Stropolina did think that there was too much “flubboodha” in the goat. This is her term for any animal-based food that is not meat. She has a very low tolerance for discrete bits of fat, gristle or any kind of connective tissue. We have learned to make allowances as she has so many other redeeming features.

Faheem provides a no-frills service. Help yourself to soft drinks, lassi, or chilled water from the fridge. The glasses are just as likely to be hot, coming straight from the dishwasher, but at least the water is cold. It is relaxed, cheerful, and extremely tasty. You need to go. Now.

In terms of ratings:

Accessibility: 5/5 Susans – and there is a carpark out the back.

Value? Up there I’d say, 4/5 Wendys.

Salt? Didn’t notice, so I guess that is 5/5 Debs.

Midnight Special though, deserves a special accessibility mention. The toilets are up three stairs, which means 0/5 Susans for them.

Next up might be a Portuguese Chicken joint, I’ll have to check and get back to you.

faheem6

Filed Under: Encore, Quest Tagged With: Blues, goat, naan, tandoori, tedeschi trucks band

Off the map – Byron #bluesfest

April 3, 2015 by Andrew Christie 2 Comments

Strop and I have abandoned King St. for Easter and headed north to hang with the young people at the Blues Festival. Actually there are a significant proportion of old farts here too, dragging their folding chairs from tent to tent, forming drifts at the edges of the tents, just far enough inside to avoid the worst of the downpours that keep life exciting. Our demographic have done the hard yards in the past but are now reduced to dancing in short bursts to reduce wear and tear on knees and feet that are playing host to Uncle Arthur-ritis. In between times we sit in our seats, listen to the music and watch the arses of the young people dancing in front of us. Things could be worse.

Highlights so far? For me it would be Trombone Shorty’s big band blues and funk, the hip hop fusion of G. Love and Special Sauce. They also win best name so far. Matt Anderson also deserves a mention – a big Canadian with a great blues voice.

On the food front, we haven’t tried that many options yet. The Byron Organic Donuts are excellent as long as Strop does the queuing, and the bratwurst and kransky are let down by the soggy rolls. The Coffee and Pies stall does reasonable coffee, but we have no idea about their pies yet.

The camping experience is a bit like what I imagine a middle class refugee camp might be like. The most dangerous things are the green-headed ants whose turf we have invaded, and the toilets. But we have survived the great tent disaster and are still talking to each other. In a minute we will head over to check out Paolo Nutini, who is unexpectedly  Scottish. The best part of festivals is the freedom to move between venues, and hang about outside. And be accosted by drunk Irishmen. “What are youse doing on your phones?”

Filed Under: Off the Map Tagged With: Blues, Byron, Festival

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